We Got Rhythm

I was walking with a friend and her daughter last week and she asked about our “schedule”. Actually it’s a common question. “What is best with your schedule?” “What is Reid’s schedule.” Etc. etc.

The Meyers-Brigg “P” in me wrestles with that question. Because the truth of the matter is the word schedule just doesn’t seem to fit the life we live. Schedule (to me) seems like a set order of things, at a set time.

sched·ule - / [skej-ool, -oo l, -oo-uh l; Pronunciation noun, verb, -uled,
-ul·ing.
–noun
1. a plan of procedure, usually written, for a proposed
objective, esp. with reference to the sequence of and time allotted for each
item or operation necessary to its completion: The schedule allows three weeks
for this stage.

2. a series of things to be done or of events to
occur at or during a particular time or period: He always has a full schedule.

3. a timetable.

Okay, away from dictionary.com and back to schedule. After hemming and hawing about “Well, you know, we sort of. . .” she laughed (she knows me well) and said, “You know the good thing about a schedule, is you have a schedule, and the bad thing about a schedule, is. . you have a schedule.”

Later that day as I nursed Reid I went a little way down the road of feeling guilty that I don’t have more of a schedule, and then decided that I wasn’t in the mood for that and embraced how our lives work out. Just a few minutes later (after deciding I wasn’t going on a guilt trip) it hit me. . . WE’VE GOT RHYTHM!

I can predict the daily Rhythm of our lives, but there isn’t “nap time” “playtime” “eat time” “naptime” “dinner time” “bed time” (emphasis on time). We get up, we play, we go for a walk, we play, we eat, we nap, we play, we eat, we take a bath, we go to bed. Our Rhythm is based on the Rhythm of Reid’s body. When he’s sleepy (and it’s a good time) I put him down for a nap, when he’s ready to play we play or he plays by himself. A few weeks ago I spent several agonizing evenings trying to get Reid to go to bed at 7:30, the time the books and I thought was good. The thing was, it was a fight. As I sat there trying everything in my power to get him to sleep I thought back to earlier in the day when I laid him in his crib without a fight, with out a sound and he rolled over and went to sleep. I thought “What made that different?” It was that he was sleepy.

So now when people say, ‘What works for Reid’s schedule”.. I say “Our rhythm is. .”
It’s just semantics, but it works for me!

Daddy took a business trip. . .

and brought mommy and Reid. . .

Still a bit big. But SOOOO cute!

Thanks Daddy!

xoxox

Reid & Mommy

a pink duck?

Reid got a package today!

What? Purple paper!?

SOOO much fun!

We LOVE to crumple paper . . .

but wait. . .

there's more. .

a PINK duck.. . that squeaks!

Does life GET any better than this?

When a pink duck comes your way, sometimes

ya gotta clap!

Crawler?

He's making progress, he's not there yet. These are from last night, he made circles around the room doing the "army crawl". . . Go Reid Man!! These blocks from Counsin Hunter are his new FAVORITE toy. He prefers the blue and yellow.

The Faces of Reid

"When the disciples.. asked Jesus who was the greatest in the kingdom of heaven, Jesus pulled a child out of the crowd and said the greatest in the kindgom of heaven were people like this (Matthew 18:1-4). . . He was saying that people who get into heaven are people who, like children, don't worry about it too much. They are people, who like children, live with thier hands open more than with their fist clenched. . . "

-Frederick Buechner
Beyond Words, Daily Readings in the ABC's of Faith

Support vs. Challenge

Support vs Challenge

I’m not sure the very first time I was introduced to the human development concept of “support vs. challenge”. . but I’m pretty sure it was sitting in the office of one of my former bosses and it probably started out with something about a Bob Dylan song and then onto the real lesson. . . “it all comes down to support vs challenge A., you’ve gotta learn how to support and challenge people just right. . .”

The last few years I ended up working with the “Master” of “Support vs Challenge” himself. (who without a doubt was responsible for teaching my former boss the concept himself) (I like to go to the source on things to learn. . . )

Support vs. Challenge is human development concept that says (basically) that in order for people to develop they need to have the right ratio of support and challenge in their environment. I have charts and notes and graphs about how this concept plays out in the development of leaders, college students and staffs. When people are in an environment of too much challenge with not enough support they get frustrated. When people are in an environment of too much support without enough challenge, they get bored. Either way people get stuck and don’t reach their full potential.

All that “academic” knowledge is great, but what it really comes down to, and where I’ve really seen the concept in action is with my seven month old.

He is a late sitter. He was rolling over and showing off young. But he wasn’t sitting up like the rest of the six month olds. I wasn’t challenging him enough, I was over supporting and not challenging. (I had that ratio wrong!). Our Gymboree teacher pulled me aside one day after class and said, Do this, this and this for three days, he’ll hate it and cry, but in three days he’ll be sitting up and loving it. (in other words “you are supporting him TOO much and not challenging him enough. .” )

So we followed her recommendations, I challenged him to sit, I let him fall over and then pulled him up again (didn’t support him as much as before, so his muscles got stronger) and guess what. . .Now he’s a sitter. He will sit for a half and hour and play with his toys.

Support vs. Challenge. Isn’t it cool how we learn this concept in a very physical way at seven months (through watching his muscles develop), so that when he is 10, and 15, and 21 I’ll know how to support and challenge him in ways that are so much less tangible, but important none-the-less.

A Soap Box. . .

Excuse me while I crawl up on my soapbox.


Okay, now that I’m here. This blog entry may shock or scandalize a few of my dear heart and gentle people readers, other’s may say, “No kidding”, and yet others may think, “so why is this a big deal?”

This isn’t a soapbox I’m just climbing on to climb on, I’ve actually been thinking and talking with people about this for weeks.

Here goes. . . .

Tomorrow marks a historic day in California. Same-Sex marriages will become legal in our Golden State. Those who are against this development (and there are many) argue that this is a “threat” to families and the institution of marriage. I for the life of me really cannot in any way, shape, or form understand how my family will be threatened by this.

It seems to me that, NOT allowing people who love each other to marry is MORE of a threat to marriage than allowing people who love each other and desire to nurture that love and commitment to marry. If we allow the state to “pick and choose” which lovers are allowed to marry isn’t that more of a long term threat than allowing love to be the basis for marriage, regardless of the gender of those desiring marriage?

Then I hear those (particularly in the Conservative Christian world. . . ) say that “We must fight for families and fight against things in our society which are threatening families.” (That’s almost a direct quote from a pretty well known Christian leader I heard on the radio last week) I say, “Amen”. . .
Let’s address the economic inequality that exist in our world, that’s a threat to my family.
Let’s get to work on finding alternative form of energy and move (quickly) away from our dependence on oil, because the rising cost of gas is negatively affecting my family (and every family) daily.
Let’s find ways to address poverty, educational budget cuts, rising food cost, our broken health-care system. . these ALL are threats to my family daily.

Tomorrow when same-sex couples get married, that won’t threaten any part of my family life. I just can’t help but wonder if we’re spending our time and energy barking up the wrong tree?

Okay, I’ll step off my soap box now. I’ve got to go stir my compost pile! 

Compost Happens

I did it. I started my compost bin. One week down, no smelly mess to speak of, no fly infestation. All is well.

It's been fun to figure out what goes in the compost bin, what doesn't and how to make it all work. It's an art, not a science. . well, maybe better stated, it's science and art.

There is something almost spiritual about this composting experience. A death and rebirth, in a very real way. Used coffee grounds,
mushy apples,
left-over salad,
used tissue,
freezer-burned peas,
and crushed egg shells from yesterday's egg salad sandwich. . .

. . the "yuck". The dead, the useless, which last week was bound for the garbage because its usefulness was gone, has suddenly become filled with the possibilities of life, of reuses, of purpose.

As I go through my day everything has the potential of being saved for the daily trip to the compost bin. (Dryer lint! Paper Towels! The dust and dog hair from my vacuum canister. . ).all get swallowed into the layers of compost with the hope and expectation of "black gold" that will nourish our roses, feed future tomatoes, lettuce and pepper plants, and help "green" our lawn.

Our home is becoming it's own mini Ecosystem.

Following the lead of a friend of a friend I purchased a $15 Fifteen Gallon garbage can from Lowe's and some dirt. I do need to put some air holes into the sides of the can. We haven't done that yet. Todd wants to know exactly WHERE each hole should be, I say. . 'anywhere'. . (This reveals much about our personalities). I keep a small Rubbermaid container next to my sink, where I collect all my composting material. Like I said above, coffee grounds, tea bags, paper towels, egg shells *(crushed), apple cores, dryer link, used tissues (Reid has a cold). . . In it all goes. They say it's 25 parts "green" (kitchen waste) with 75 parts "brown" (dirt, dry leaves, shredded newspaper). It's a mix of carbon and nitrogen. We'll see as the days get warmer, how my percentages are working out. What I have been doing is putting in my "green" and then putting in a couple of large handfuls of dirt, yesterday I put in two torn up sections of the LA Times. Today I'll "mix" it. (Using a rake to mix up all the layers.)

It really feels good to take what appears to be "garbage" and "waste" and give it a new life.

Start composting people!!!! :)


www.compostguide.com
http://gatheringinlight.com/2007/10/15/how-to-start-a-compost-bin-in-the-city-with-little-money/#more-791

Fun with Nana & Papa

I put my toes in the sand. . .



showed nana how I eat peas


played in my "pool". . it was really just my bath tub outside, but don't tell mommy & Nana, they thought it was a pool!!


and jumped with my uncle Will. . . he's really fun!